Monday, February 20, 2012

The Happenings Happening

I bugged my good friend Phil B. to do a guest blog post about whatever he wanted, in an effort to promote his upcoming gardening blog. Below is the awesome result. Enjoy!



What's Happening?

As I sit here on a lovely Saturday evening checking out free on demand movies while drinking a bloody mary, I came upon one of my favorite movies, M. Night Shamalamadingdong's The Happening.

I believe it is in the free category since it is such a quality movie (18% on Rotten Tomatoes) and everyone should have the chance to see it.

SPOILER ALERT: The premise of the movie is that plants worldwide are giving off a neurotoxin which causes people to lose their interest in self-preservation.

The plants are producing this neurotoxin as a response to man-made global warming. The horrible thing people in this movie have to run away from is (careful next part is scary): THE WIND. The Happening happens to open with people throwing themselves off buildings, pretty odd.



Now, while watching it for the 37th time, I have been pondering if the events that occur in The Happening are scientifically possible. I have analyzed three facts as scientifically as my biology degree allows:

The first thing I pondered was the possibility that all plants have the ability to work together and simultaneously produce a neurotoxin (of any sort, not just the suicide one of The Happening). Plants HAVE been found to communicate with other plants and insects, a fact stated in the movie, through chemicals.

The theory in the movie is that the plants are exacting revenge on human kind for the climate change, which they have caused. Now the fact that they have evolved something for a very specific reason is a fallacy as evolution is never intentional.

One way that all of the common plants could have the pathways for producing a neurotoxin is a common distant ancestor. This would have evolved a neurotoxin to protect itself from mammals which in turn would affect humans (plenty of plants are poisonous). Since all of the plants are related to the ancestor which evolved the toxic ability, most of them would in turn have the toxic ability.

The other way all plants could contain the neurotoxins would be through genetic exchange in the root connections that plants share. Plants have been found to communicate through chemicals absorbed through root connections where different plants have grown together.

Walnuts are infamous for the chemicals they produce. You cannot plant other plants beneath walnut trees since they produce juglones, which act as an herbicide and will kill any other plants. (If you have seen the movie the group size thing is bull crap too. If a neurotoxin affects humans, group size won't matter). All plants have pores through which they could emit an airborne neurotoxin, called stomata.

The odds of either of the above genetic events happening are very very low. I do hope plants don't attack humans. They are a little ubiquitous to avoid being hurt.

The second thing I went over using my vast amounts of scientific knowledge is whether Mark Wahlberg could be a science teacher. The answer is no. But he CAN sing the Doobie Brothers "Black Water."

The third thing I went over, with my scientific degree conferred upon me by my college I attended, is whether my plants would turn against me. I damn well hope they don't cause I take better care of them than my mother does!!!!

The three reasons why "The Happening" happens to be my favorite movie:

  1. A botanist is a hero. As I've said this doesn't happen often (more like never until my series of movies comes out where they will be the hero every time!).
  2. It's a movie that says its title within the movie
  3. The location where The Happening happens is Pennsylvania, albeit the Philadelphia portion of the state, still have to represent PA.

To wrap up my analysis:

Overall it's a good stab at an environmentalist movie by M. Night Shyamalan and I do appreciate him giving a botanist the chance to be the hero of the movie. Now back to catching up on Doomsday Preppers on National Geographic (oddly enough they haven't done a show about plants attacking humans like The Happening but I assume they'll get there).

-Phil B.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Why Turntable is AWESOME



I was a little late to include this in my current obsessions, but Turntable has ruled supreme lately in my free time.

With a simple process of logging in through Facebook or twitter, it is the BEST way to find and listen to new music with like-minded friends. Before you start thinking this a plug though, try it out for yourself. The search system needs refined, and I'm sure they DJ'ing system will be tweaked, but it is the most fun you'll have online for a long time.

You have the choice to either make a public or private room with your friends and play whatever your heart desires. If they don't have it, you can upload it. If you don't like it, you can lame it. If you DO like it, you can awesome it and give the DJ credit with points.

Don't like the room you are currently in? Leave it and go to a random one, like chat roulette without the peni (yes, plural). Just want to listen at work without the task of DJ'ing? Check out the Indie While You Work room.

At some point in the near future, come DJ with me and see what all the fuss is about.